Recently, a good friend was sharing how hard it was for her to pray right now. She is going through a wilderness time in her life and is very angry. She keeps wondering what God is doing and feels like He has completely abandoned her.
It reminded me of some of the darkest times in my life and how hard it was to pray during those times. I remember when a friend was murdered by her husband and I really was angry with God for allowing it. Then there was the time when my husband had been laid off from work and we had been struggling to get by on what he made when he was working. Again, I was angry and thought God had abandoned us and was punishing us for some reason.
I remember thinking that it was showing disrespect to be angry at God. Slowly, I started to realize that pretending to be happy when I was really angry was being disrespectful. God wants us to be real with Him. Sometimes it seems He holds back until we finally come to the place where we pray and tell Him what’s really on our mind, not what we think He wants to hear.
Jesus is again an excellent example. When He was facing the last minutes of His crucifixion, He cried out, “My God, My God why have you forsaken me?” He was being real about His feelings at that moment. When we bring our true feelings to God, then He can begin to work in our lives.
The friend that I mentioned earlier shared how she received peace after she admitted her anger and shared with God what was really on her heart. She was able to reconnect with God again once she realized that she was not doing something wrong by being angry with Him.
Our heavenly Father wants to be in a relationship with us. That means He accepts us just as we are and I believe He delights in us when we come to Him and share what we have on our hearts. We don’t need to get our heart right before we come to Him, but He helps to bring our heart where it needs to be when we come to Him and lay down the truth of where we are.
What are you attempting to hide from God today?