Photo by iTopher from Flickr
Lately, I’ve been frustrated with what has seemed like a lack of growth.
All roads seem to point to dead ends.
I thought I would be so much further along on my journey by now.
I’ve felt distant. Distant from God, my family, my friends and the people I’ve been reaching out to help.
Last night going to the jail was the last thing I wanted to do. I didn’t feel like going. It seems to have no real impact. We have such a short time with these women to tell them they are loved, they matter and God cares about what they’re going through.
We can’t fix them, which is what I long to do. We come and share what God has laid on our hearts and then He does the rest, but they get to choose to respond or not. That’s the difficult part, watching them choose something different.
It got me thinking how patient God is. He has given all of us chance after chance and how many have we wasted.
It really shows me I’m no different from these women in front of me.
How many times has God gotten me out of my pit and put me on solid ground only to have me smile and say, “Thanks God, I can handle it from here.”?
How long has he suffered through my pity party, just waiting for me to wake up and see how He has blessed me?
How many times has He opened one door and watched me struggle to open the door He’s closed?
How many times has He silently listened to me blame Him for the circumstances in my life?
Last night, these women touched my heart and I felt a new kinship with them. We have much more in common than I ever would admit before. I left knowing I’m right where God wants me to be and that’s what matters. The outcome is His and not for me to know.
Today, I’m thankful my Heavenly Father chooses to love me despite how I respond to Him. I’m loved the same every day, whether I feel it or not…whether I think I deserve it or not.
Who can you relate to today? Do you know you’re loved just as you are?